Monday, 5 March 2012

Second Challenge for the Fourth Campaign - Warning! Contains Nuances of Certain Activities - Also, an Award

Woo! This one's a doozy, Rach!

I won't copy out all the prompts/rules, but here are the one's I've followed:

"Write a short story/flash fiction piece of less than 200 words based on the prompts" - I've chosen prompt 5:


"For added difficulty/challenge: Ask Challenge entrants to critique your writing"

So, have at it!

This is a scene shortened from the original incident in Rome, Rhymes and Risk. Ayten and Devran escaped from their kidnappers that morning and have been walking/running/hiding all day. Tonight they've made camp, with a bit of fire...
The dark woods pressed close all around their camp.

Stirring the fire one last time, he tossed the fir twig onto the flames.

Ayten dozed in the crook of his arm. The blanket had slipped off her shoulder, but her skin was warm against his. They hardly needed the fire.

Her fingers had landed in his lap; if he shifted, they'd be close to - ah.

She hadn't stirred. One by one he raised her fingers, took them in his hand, and tugged them forward to cover him.

"Beautiful girl," he whispered in her ear, and she smiled with her eyes closed, and drew herself up.

Her breasts rose with her movement, and he tasted her gold-shadowed skin, lit by the fire. She arched her back, and her hand fell away from his lap.

"Touch me," he murmured, kissing up her neck, into her hair, redolent of pine needles. He wrapped his hand about hers and guided her, his need at the edge already. His breath came short.

***

"I was right," he said, some time later.

She lay on his chest, hand curled over his heart. "Mmm?"

He traced a forefinger up her arm. "We don't need the fire."

Cat gave me a lovely award!

Here're my answers to the award questions:

What's your favourite...
colour: purple - or yellow
animal: my cats Frodo and Sam
number: seven
non-alcoholic drink: coffee, with warm milk
pattern: Tolkien's Tree of Amalion (and his friezes and emblems)
flower: jasmine

What are your passions?: reading and writing

Facebook or Twitter: I'm on Facebook, Google+, Pinterest, and Tumblr

Getting or giving presents?: both!

This award goes to... Everyone who's stopping by from the campaign and would like a little ray of sunshine!

29 comments:

Nadja Notariani said...

Die schreiben ist heisse!! haha.

Really great excerpt/entry, Deniz. Loved the flow of dialogue, description, emotion melded together.....'redolent with pine'...favorite phrase. :)

Siv Maria said...

Beautifully descriptive and nicely toasted :)

meradeth said...

Nice! Well, er, pictured in so few words!

Rachel Morgan said...

"gold-shadowed skin, lit by the fire." <--- beautiful :-)

xx Rachel
My entry

Tara Tyler said...

definitely different!
and sweet imagery!

S.P. Bowers said...

Nice scene. I'm going to have to think about this challenge.

My favorite flower is an Iris.

Cherie Reich said...

Great imagery. I love the last line. :)

Jamie Gibbs said...

Nice flash fiction; you set the scene pretty damn well :D

Morgan said...

Yummmmm... I like me some steam ;) Really awesome. Off to go "like" ;)

Nancy Thompson said...

Great imagery! What was I thinking? I thought we had to use all the prompts. Now I see we didn't. Oh well, I gave it my best try. I'm entry #5.

Nas Dean said...

Loved the excerpt, Deniz. Congrats on the award and your aswers are interesting!

Romance Book Haven said...

Oh! The cliffhanger? Nice excerpt, very well done!

Ashley Nixon said...

So. Much. Tension. lol.
Great job--I loved the "not needing the fire" aspect! Very nice!

Rek said...

Very good entry...nice steamy without being obvious scene. So Finally Devran is having a good time, poor guy. :)

Jennifer Fischetto said...

Nice job creating his sexual tension. :)

Susan Fields said...

Great entry! And I love your cats names! :)

sue said...

excellent sensory images
Sue #48

KSCollier said...

Good work!

DeniseCovey_L_Aussie said...

Hey Deniz, this is an awesome treatment of the prompt! Congrats on your award too!

Denise

C.M.Brown said...

A little bit of heat there! Nicely done!

Nick Wilford said...

Nice intimate scene, without being over the top. Well done!

Traci Kenworth said...

Nice!!

Mina Burrows said...

I liked it. It certainly can get hot by the camp fire. Nice job!

Deniz Bevan said...

Thank you so much everyone! You've given me lots of confidence, I was worried at first about posting this scene...

The Capillary said...

I can definitley say I wasn't expecting a little bit of romance in this Challenge. Well done!

#46

The Golden Eagle said...

Interesting use of the prompt! :) Great entry.

Jessica Salyer said...

Definitely didn't need the fire. ;) nicely done.

kelworthfiles said...

Hot flash, coming through! ;) Thanks for sharing it.

Deniz Bevan said...

Thanks guys!

Books I'm Reading and Finished Books

  • Emily of New Moon by L.M. Montgomery
  • Nightmares and Dreamscapes by Stephen King
  • ***Reading At Intervals***
  • Beowulf and Sellic Spell by J. R. R. Tolkien
  • Parade's End by Ford Madox Ford
  • The War of the Ring - Book 8 in the History of Middle Earth series by Christopher Tolkien and J R R Tolkien (reread)
  • What to Expect in Baby's First Year
  • Baby's First Year for Dummies
  • 11 Doctors 11 Stories by various authors (including Neil Gaiman)
  • Creed or Chaos? by Dorothy Sayers
  • The Hobbit by J. R. R. Tolkien manuscripts edited by J. D. Rateliff
  • Moby Dick by Herman Melville
  • The Jerusalem Bible
  • ***Finished Books***
  • The Art of Asking by Amanda Palmer
  • A Rose for the ANZAC Boys by Jackie French
  • The Adventures of Tom Bombadil by J.R.R. Tolkien (expanded edition; reread of some)
  • Married by Midnight by Talli Roland
  • Hansel and Gretel by Neil Gaiman
  • The Sleeper and the Spindle by Neil Gaiman
  • The Cruellest Month by Louise Penny
  • Dead Cold by Louise Penny
  • The Banks of Certain Rivers by Jon Harrison
  • Lessons for a Sunday Father by Claire Calman
  • The Magician by Somerset Maugham
  • Rogue Spy by Joanna Bourne
  • The Lord of the Rings by J. R. R. Tolkien (annual reread)
  • The Hotel New Hampshire by John Irving (skimmed last third)
  • A Matter of Grave Concern by Brenda Novak
  • Fatal Fallout by Lara Lacombe
  • secret beta read!
  • The Heart of Christmas by Brenda Novak
  • Deadly Contact by Lara Lacombe
  • Carry On, Jeeves by P. G. Wodehouse
  • The Floating Admiral by the Detection Club, including Christie, Sayers, Chesterton, etc.
  • Brief Lives, Sandman 8 by Neil Gaiman
  • Liza of Lambeth by Somerset Maugham
  • The Mapmaker's Daughter by Laurel Corona (I give up on finishing this; skimmed to the end)
  • Childe Harold by Lord Byron (listened to the parts of it set in Switzerland read aloud)
  • Written in My Own Heart's Blood by Diana Gabaldon
  • My Dancing Bear by Helene de Klerk
  • The Silkworm by Robert Galbraith
  • The Silver Sword by Ian Serraillier
  • Jane of Lantern Hill by L. M. Montgomery
  • Tu Vas Naitre by Sylvia Kitzinger
  • Goodbye To All That by Robert Graves
  • secret beta read 2!
  • Trust Your Eyes by Linwood Barclay
  • The Caliph's Vacation by Goscinny (Iznogoud series; Canadian translation) (reread)
  • Neither Here Nor There by Bill Bryson
  • Le Tresor de Rackham le Rouge by Herge (Tintin series) (reread)
  • Le Secret de la Licorne by Herge (Tintin series) (reread)
  • L'Affaire Tournesol by Herge (Tintin series) (reread)
  • The Bum by Somerset Maugham (short story)
  • The Colour of Magic, Discworld 1 by Terry Pratchett
  • Fables and Reflections Sandman 6 by Neil Gaiman
  • Doctor Fischer of Geneva or The Bomb Party by Graham Greene
  • Once Upon an Heirloom by Kait Nolan (novella)
  • The No-Kids Club by Talli Roland
  • Snip, Snip Revenge by Medeia Sharif
  • Journey to an 800 Number by E. L. Konigsburg
  • various Neil Gaiman short stories on the An Evening With Neil Gaiman and Amanda Palmer album (reread (well, this time in audio))
  • And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie (reread; actually this was an older edition, published under the original title of Ten Little N******)
  • Dumb Witness by Agatha Christie (reread)
  • Never Saw It Coming by Linwood Barclay
  • How To Fall In Love by Cecelia Ahern
  • biographical note on Lord Peter Wimsey in reissue of Clouds of Witness by Dorothy Sayers (on Gutenberg)
  • One Hundred Names by Cecelia Ahern
  • Notwithstanding by Louis de Bernieres
  • The Eyes of the Dragon by Stephen King
  • Temptation by Sandy Loyd
  • The Incorrigible Mr. Lumley by Aileen Fish
  • Effie's Outlaw by Karen Lopp
  • Breathing Lessons by Anne Tyler
  • The Christmas Crossing by Bev Petterson (short story)
  • secret beta read!
  • An Astronaut's Guide to Life on Earth by Chris Hadfield
  • Forgotten by Catherine McKenzie
  • Arranged by Catherine McKenzie
  • Emil In the Soup Tureen by Astrid Lindgren
  • Whales by Jacques Cousteau (excerpt essay from his book)
  • Tutankhamen's Tomb by Howard Carter (excerpt essay from his book)
  • Ice Dogs by Terry Lynn Johnson
  • Everything's Eventual by Stephen King
  • Go the F*^$ To Sleep (board book)
  • Green Eggs and Ham by Dr Seuss (reread) (brought to you by Neil Gaiman: http://www.worldbuilders.org/our-next-stretch-goal-unlocks-at/neil-gaiman-reads-green-eggs-and-ham)
  • The Sagan Diary by John Scalzi
  • mini Twitter stories by Talli Roland (available here: http://advice.uk.match.com/dating-advice/enjoy-valentine%E2%80%99s-day-and-get-mentallydating?utm_expid=55691082-15.2L0G0ictTcSJ4BI9Srh77A.0&utm_referrer=http%3A%2F%2Fadvice.uk.match.com%2Fdating-advice)
  • The Book of Jane by Anne Dayton and May Vanderbilt
  • Chicken Soup for the Soul: O Canada The Wonders of Winter
  • Beloved Demons by Anthony Martignetti
  • Hands-on Therapy by T L Watson
  • Let Me Make Myself Plain by Catherine Cookson
  • The Razor's Edge by Somerset Maugham
  • Mystery of the Fat Cat by Frank Bonham
  • Spin by Catherine Mckenzie
  • Virgins by Diana Gabaldon
  • The Snow Queen by Hans Christian Andersen (reread)
  • The Friday Night Knitting Club by Kate Jacobs
  • The Ghost in the Window by Betty Ren Wright
  • The Progress of Love by Alice Munro
  • The Treason of Isengard - Book 7 in the History of Middle Earth series by Christopher Tolkien and J R R Tolkien (reread)
  • The Tales of Beedle the Bard by J. K. Rowling (reread)
  • Behind the Lines (poems) by A. A. Milne
  • the Harry Potter series by J. K. Rowling (reread)
  • Chicken Soup for the Expectant Mother's Soul
  • see the 2013 list and statistics at http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.ca/2014/01/toast-to-professor-books-read-in-2013.html
  • see the 2012 list and statistics here http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.ca/2012/12/the-hobbit-review-and-year-end-books.html
  • see the 2011 statistics on http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.ca/2012/01/books-read-in-2011-statistics-fourth.html
  • see the 2011 list at http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.ca/2012/01/books-read-in-2011.html
  • see the 2010 list at http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.com/2010/12/books-read-in-2010-listed-here.html
  • see the 2009 list at http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.com/2009/12/books-read-in-2009-part-ii.html
  • also in 2009 at http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.com/2009/12/books-read-in-2009-part-iv.html
  • see the 2008 list at http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.com/2008/12/books-read-in-2008-part-ii.html
  • also in 2008 at http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.com/2008/12/books-read-in-2008-part-vi.html
  • also in 2008 at http://thegirdleofmelian.blogspot.com/2008/12/books-read-in-2008-part-iv.html